


dying's not on the table

by ignitesthestars



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Found Family, Kissing, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-08
Updated: 2018-04-08
Packaged: 2019-04-20 08:33:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14257032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignitesthestars/pseuds/ignitesthestars
Summary: It’s not that Rose isupsetto be alive. She’s very grateful, in fact, especially when she realises just how many (few) faces are left in the Rebellion. That all of them fit into theMillenium Falcon, a miracle and a horror all at once.But she peels her eyes open, one at a time, and after the first wave of truly impressive agony (her hair hurts?? Somehow??) comes a second wave of truly impressive mortification when she sees Finn slumped by her makeshift bedside and remembers.





	dying's not on the table

It’s not that Rose is _upset_ to be alive. She’s very grateful, in fact, especially when she realises just how many (few) faces are left in the Rebellion. That all of them fit into the _Millenium Falcon_ , a miracle and a horror all at once.

But she peels her eyes open, one at a time, and after the first wave of truly impressive agony (her hair hurts?? Somehow??) comes a second wave of truly impressive mortification when she sees Finn slumped by her makeshift bedside and remembers.

Dying’s not on the table (that’s not how they win), but not existing for like, a day? While she gets over making an absolute idiot of herself? Would be really nice. 

...Not as nice as Finn’s confused grin, like his face has figured out she’s awake before his brain has caught up. But to be fair, Rose doesn’t think there’s anything in the galaxy as nice as that.

“You’re awake,” he whispers, like he’s just seen the sun rise or something. And then he blinks and there’s a frown marring his expression and he’s leaping to his feet and Rose can’t decide if it’s a very good thing or a very bad thing that he’s not looking at her anymore. “Hey! Uuuuh, medic? She’s awake!”

 _Oh good_ , she thinks dizzily. _We still have a medic._

And then Finn is bustled away by someone with a gentle voice and not very gentle hand, and Rose is able to breathe normally again.

“Ow,” she mumbles, because actually that sort of hurts.

-

The thing is that even if she’s hurt, the _Falcon_ is an old ship and Rose is a very good mechanic. So that’s how she meets the infamous Rey ( _just Rey_ the other girl says, with a smile that aches), the two of them huddled together in the bowels of the ship, trading stories and tools back and forth as the _Falcon_ spits steam at them. 

“Finn told me what you said,” she says, very seriously, and honestly why not just stab her in the face with a lasersword, it’d be less painful probably. Oblivious to Rose’s current agony, she nods, like she’s agreeing with past!Rose. “About fighting for the things we love. I think you’re right. I think it’s the only way to move forward.”

“Oh - oh,” Rose croaks. “Um. Well, you know. People get poetic when they think they’re going to die, I guess.”

Something about that makes the other girls eyes open wide. Her mouth opens too, like she wants to say something but can’t find the words, and all of a sudden Rose finds herself the recipient of a very careful, very soft hug.

For a second, she freezes. Rose is only good with her hands when it involves machinery, so they flutter about for a moment as she forgets everything she’s ever known about hugs. But Rey smells like oil and grease and family, so she closes her eyes and pieces the motion together, one arm at a time.

“I’m glad you didn’t die,” Rey tells her.

Rose thinks of her sister. She thinks of Paige and her sacrifice and how few people there are left to carry the light of the Resistance forward. She thinks of _home_ , which has been a dozen different places over her life and right now is this ship, cradled in the nothingness of space, kept going by a small collection of hands and some spare hope.

“Yeah,” she says, and thinks of Finn. “Yeah, me too.”

-

He finds her right when she decides it’s time to stop hiding.

They’ve docked on some seedy Outer Rim planet for fuel and spare parts and half a second to breathe. Most of the people on board have found a reason to get out and stretch their legs, but when Rose figures out that Finn hasn’t left, she decides to stay behind as well.

“Time to face the music,” she mutters, peering around a corner to find - oh. Finn’s face.

Wait.

Finn’s face?

The yelp comes out before she can process what it was she wanted to say, the speech she’d very carefully prepared about the importance of friendship and the Resistance and hahaha what’s love anyway? She half clocks that Finn makes his own, slightly manlier shriek of surprise, but he recovers first, a look of determination settling on his features.

“I’m not avoiding you,” he declares.

“I - what?”

“I know I haven’t seen you since you woke up, and I feel really bad about that. And then I realised that - well, that you might think I was uncomfortable or feeling weird, or that I didn’t want to see you. And none of that is true, I just - i just haven’t been able to find you.”

Rose opens her mouth. Shuts it again.

“I know that sounds like a really lame excuse, especially seeing as we’re on a pretty small ship, but it’s the truth. I actually really wanted to see you. A lot.”

“I wanted to see you too,” Rose manages, because it’s the truth. She might have been _avoiding_ seeing him, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want to.

Finn ducks his head, but not before she sees the little smile there. The one that seems to say _yeah you did_ a lot more than it does anything more self-effacing, and she smacks him on the arm before she can help herself.

“ _Ow_ \- what was that for?”

“You aren’t worried at all!”

“What - hey, that’s not true! I was really worried you would think I was upset or something!”

“Yeah, but you’re not worried about _me_ wanting to see _you_.”

“Well—“ That smile again, just a flicker before he swipes it away with the back of his hand. He rubs his neck, tipping his head up at the ceiling this time like that’s going to save him. “I mean. You did say love, y’know? I might’ve grown up around a bunch of emotionally repressed jerks and Stormtroopers, but I know all about love.”

Rose thinks of Rey, and Poe, thinks _that’s fair_ , stops thinking because all the blood is rushing to her face and that’s making it hard to string more than three words together in her brain. She crosses her arms over her chest, huffs. “I shouldn’t have. You’re a jerk.”

Except he doesn’t respond with that smile again. A stricken look comes over his face instead, very real concern overwhelming the teasing atmosphere between them. “Oh. Oh man, did I—? Crap, I’m sorry Rose, I didn’t mean—”

She flicks him this time, right on the shoulder. The planet they’re on his hot, and he’s wearing a distressingly thin workshirt, so she gets him in the flesh, sharp enough to get another yelp out of him. 

“ _Hey_.”

“Can I kiss you?” she finds herself saying, and it’s like all of the oxygen is abruptly sucked out of the air. They stare at each other for one frozen second that feels like an eternity and Rose is about to reel everything back and flee when Finn finally moves.

His hands come up, burn-scarred and soft despite their size as he cups her face.

“I mean,” he says, and his breath is warm and sweet, brushing her lips, “I was gonna ask. Guess it shouldn’t surprise me that you got there first again.”

Rose swallows. Her face is hot and she’s not sure what to do with her own hands, but for the first time since she woke up, her head is strangely clear. Like she knows exactly what to do, finally.

“Are you gonna do it?” she says, tipping her weight up onto her toes. “Or do I have to go for it this time as w—”

He kisses her. And Rose hasn’t kissed a whole lot of people in her life, and she gets the feelings that pronbably Finn hasn’t either, but it’s wonderful anyway. Maybe wonderful because of that.

Her hands settle at his waist, and she leans in.

 


End file.
